This isn't prose, I swear. It's supposed to be rythmic.
Don't bother me, I'm busy.
I'm translating a paper. It's in english...
but I'm translating it to English.
Translating from english, to english.
The medical term is Plagiarism.
I made a carbon copy, except I took out the "r" and "p" and switched the letters around. It's coy bacon.
It's a cloning machine, really, without all the hardware.
Or all the software. It's just a Word document
About the purple-backed gorilla... bird...
Fish...-asaurus.
It's a riveting read, I assure you.
From a reliable source. I think it's pronounced We Key Pedia. Or Wickey Pedia
It's the awesomest thing, straight out of the gates of Hell.
I added some trivia to the article. It can breathe fire now.
It's so awesome, I'm surprised nobody made a pokemon out of it yet.
You know, like you're walking on the sidewalk of Victory Road
When suddenly, a wild purple-backed gorilla bird fish-asaurus appears!
You'd need to approach it strategically. Go Squirtle!
Man, I should study more...
Friday, May 18, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
The Argonian
Bet you can't find what this is based on!
They call Rutherford The Lizard. It irks us both, and I’m human. He literally is, but we’re all similar. This Argonian knows not our social norms.
“Water?” He asks.
The bartender complies with a glare. He’s used to this, but Rutherford’s native blood has taught him to be hostile. His black scaly fist clenched tightly.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Rival's Perverse
This one is exclusive to the hardcore 90's kids. Otherwise, you won't get it.
My neighbor calls me LOSER.
Gramps does it more
Gramps said he was better than me,
but oh, not anymore.
We go our separate ways
We're off to be the best
And even though I hate him,
It's Gramps I must impress.
I go with my companions
and climb right to the top.
Did he really have to come
to make all my dreams stop?
Gramps says he loves him more
that's when I start to choke
Cause he will never understand
The life of Gary Oak.
Yup. that just happened. A poem about your Rival in Pokemon. Somebody give me a Pulitzer Prize, please!
My neighbor calls me LOSER.
Gramps does it more
Gramps said he was better than me,
but oh, not anymore.
We go our separate ways
We're off to be the best
And even though I hate him,
It's Gramps I must impress.
I go with my companions
and climb right to the top.
Did he really have to come
to make all my dreams stop?
Gramps says he loves him more
that's when I start to choke
Cause he will never understand
The life of Gary Oak.
Yup. that just happened. A poem about your Rival in Pokemon. Somebody give me a Pulitzer Prize, please!
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Morning After a Stormy Night
Quick! Click on this link before you read the poem!
http://i.imgur.com/crcei.jpg
Morning After a Stormy Night
I gaze upon the crumbled tower;
I feel my dog down at my side.
I truly think it is a wonder
how we survived that stormy night.
The shepherds gather up their sheep
and go to find another field.
What they have left behind is mine to keep,
Nobody's there to make me yield.
But that's the life of one like me,
The dirty life of a dirty thief.
They exile me because of morals,
they murder us for our beliefs.
But I have met a furry partner
And the joker he will be called.
He has a habit of killing sheep,
and always eating those he'd mauled.
Nobody will ever understands us,
but I don't think they see the light,
of the perfect duo in this painting,
the man and dog down on the right.
I wrote this with the crumbling tower and the guy in the corner with his dog. Please give constructive criticism! :D
http://i.imgur.com/crcei.jpg
Morning After a Stormy Night
I gaze upon the crumbled tower;
I feel my dog down at my side.
I truly think it is a wonder
how we survived that stormy night.
The shepherds gather up their sheep
and go to find another field.
What they have left behind is mine to keep,
Nobody's there to make me yield.
But that's the life of one like me,
The dirty life of a dirty thief.
They exile me because of morals,
they murder us for our beliefs.
But I have met a furry partner
And the joker he will be called.
He has a habit of killing sheep,
and always eating those he'd mauled.
Nobody will ever understands us,
but I don't think they see the light,
of the perfect duo in this painting,
the man and dog down on the right.
I wrote this with the crumbling tower and the guy in the corner with his dog. Please give constructive criticism! :D
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
The Tree-Punching Adventure of JD
You won't see many Minecraft related posts, I swear.
The low quality, pixelated JD warped in to the vast world before him. He just spent $22 to go into this world, and he was going to make it worth every penny. He read all the wikis, mastered the art of the crafting table, and has probably read every tweet that Notch has ever posted. He was ready to play Minecraft.
He had learned throughout many past experiences and parodies that the first thing you must do is punch trees to get log blocks. I can't punch that, he thought, It's a tree. So against all of his prior logic and knowledge, he repeatedly slugged at the tree. Success. A perfect cube of log fell out of the tree. Now only a few more times, and he can build a house.
Hours later, as the sun went down, he had completed a modest one-room house with an attic and basement. He was about to lay down and call it a day, when an unfamiliar voice called to him. Nervous, JD looked out the window to see who the visitor was. He was a six foot tall, top-heavy, four-legged monster in a dull shade of green.
"Hey JD," the strange fellow said, "This... is a very nice... house... you have here. It would be a shhhhhaame if something were to happen to it..."
His S's were long and dragged out like a hiss. His voice was a silly one, but his appearance made up for it in creepiness. As he finished his sentence, he flashed into a bright white, then exploded.
GAME OVER, JD's screen read, his score was somehow &e0.
"Oh well," JD sighed, "Back to Gears 3!"
The low quality, pixelated JD warped in to the vast world before him. He just spent $22 to go into this world, and he was going to make it worth every penny. He read all the wikis, mastered the art of the crafting table, and has probably read every tweet that Notch has ever posted. He was ready to play Minecraft.
He had learned throughout many past experiences and parodies that the first thing you must do is punch trees to get log blocks. I can't punch that, he thought, It's a tree. So against all of his prior logic and knowledge, he repeatedly slugged at the tree. Success. A perfect cube of log fell out of the tree. Now only a few more times, and he can build a house.
Hours later, as the sun went down, he had completed a modest one-room house with an attic and basement. He was about to lay down and call it a day, when an unfamiliar voice called to him. Nervous, JD looked out the window to see who the visitor was. He was a six foot tall, top-heavy, four-legged monster in a dull shade of green.
"Hey JD," the strange fellow said, "This... is a very nice... house... you have here. It would be a shhhhhaame if something were to happen to it..."
His S's were long and dragged out like a hiss. His voice was a silly one, but his appearance made up for it in creepiness. As he finished his sentence, he flashed into a bright white, then exploded.
GAME OVER, JD's screen read, his score was somehow &e0.
"Oh well," JD sighed, "Back to Gears 3!"
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